Today is my birthday…LOL!

Oh yes, it’s been a while, and there are so many reasons for it that I will get to in upcoming writings, but this one is more focused on the present.

Today was different than any other birthday for a lot of reasons. Last year was officially the first birthday I had without my mom. But with her passing being just days before my birthday, I was still pretty foggy and not sure I comprehended it all. Honestly, all of the holidays last year were a blur. So, this year I’m feeling it all a little more. I woke up thinking about how she and my dad  ( and just her after my dad passed) would call and sing Happy Birthday to me. My mom had a beautiful voice, and when she and my dad harmonized…wow. Maybe with it having been a year, even with me being more aware of the reality of her being gone, it was more bitter-sweet than just bitter. I can remember things like her singing with a smile on my face instead of just tears.

This birthday has been one of all kinds of new beginnings. I’m starting a new job soon. The same type of job I’ve had for years, but in a different industry. I think it’ll be good and hopefully less stressful. Work/life balance has become a much bigger player in my career choice.

An old friend contacted me that I hadn’t spoken with for years. We texted for hours and made amends of what was at one time a very close connection that I thought was irretrievably broken.

I received a ton of happy birthday posts on FB and texts but two simple messages stood out above the rest. A text from my new son-in-law saying “Happy Birthday, Mom” and one from my daughter-in-love that said “Happy Birthday, Beautiful.” They mean so much because my son-in-law lost his mother at a young age, and I am honored to be considered a mother figure to this most extraordinary young man. And for my daughter-in-love to call me beautiful means so much because I know she isn’t talking about anything having to do with my looks. I am so blessed to have these two amazing people who love my two most splendid gifts, my children.

So many people fear getting older. And I get it. Our bodies change and sometimes hurt, but with age comes so many excellent gifts like grace, understanding, forgiveness, and wisdom.

Thank you to everyone that made today (and all my past birthdays) special and memorable. You mean more to me than you will ever know.