There’s a stretch of life that feels like a pressure cooker. You’re not just building your own future, you’re supporting everyone else’s too. The kids still need you. The parents now do, too. And somehow, you’re expected to keep the lights on, stay sane, and have a retirement plan in place.

Welcome to the middle.

This stage, often called the “sandwich generation”,  is where so many people find themselves emotionally stretched and financially scrambled. You’re the go-to person for school pickups, sports fees, emergency dental appointments, and also the one researching Medicare plans, managing doctor visits, and making sure your parents don’t fall for the latest scam call.

It’s a season of deep love, real responsibility, and if we’re being honest…a little chaos.

The Unspoken Toll

Let’s talk numbers for a second. It’s not just the emotional labor. It’s the money.

You might be covering part of your parents’ prescriptions, helping with their rent, or paying for in-home care. At the same time, your teenager just announced they want to tour colleges, each one with a tuition price tag that could fund a luxury car.

Add in your own rising property tax, food costs that feel like a prank, and the guilt of not saving enough for your own retirement, and yeah, it’s a lot.

And here’s the kicker: Most people in this spot don’t talk about it. They just quietly stretch their budgets, skip vacations, and push their own goals to the back burner.

The Myth of “Having It All Together”

There’s this subtle pressure to pretend you’re managing just fine. But behind closed doors, the budget spreadsheet isn’t adding up. You’ve dipped into savings. You’re making minimum payments. And sometimes, you wonder how long you can keep this up.

If this is you, let me say this clearly: “If it feels like you’re sinking, maybe it’s because you’ve taken on a load too heavy to carry alone.

What You Can Do (Even If It’s Not Perfect)

You may not be able to fix everything overnight, but there are a few things that can make this season more manageable:

• Get brutally honest about your numbers. It’s tempting to avoid the hard look at the bank account. But clarity is a kindness to your future self.
• Prioritize ruthlessly. You can’t give everyone everything. Choose what really matters right now; maybe it’s college savings over a new car, or saying no to a costly family event you can’t swing this year.
• Ask for help. From your siblings, from your partner, from a financial coach. You don’t have to do this alone.
• Talk to your kids and your parents. When transparency is shared with love and care, it builds trust, and sometimes it even sparks unexpected solutions, like scholarships or shared caregiving that come out of family brainstorming sessions.
• Give yourself grace. This isn’t a season of perfect plans. It’s a season of surviving with heart.

This Is Temporary

It doesn’t always feel like it, but this season will change. Your parents won’t need the same level of care forever. Your kids won’t live at home forever (even if it really seems like they might). And eventually, you’ll come up for air.

But while you’re in the middle, remember this: You’re not alone, and you’re not doing it wrong. You’re just doing what strong, loving, resilient people have always done—figuring it out, one hard decision at a time.

And that, my friend, is something to be proud of.