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All This Time

What’s good today friends? I apologize for my long delay in posting again. Once more it was some very unexpected circumstances that lead to my lack of posting.

My mother has been very sick so I have been traveling back and forth between states. This last time was the most vital travels of my life. You see my mom almost didn’t make it.

She has been suffering from heart issues for a while. And before her most recent surgery, my sister and I sat in her hospital room helping her plan her funeral. Friends, I can not even explain to you what that is like. To sit with the woman who gave you life, whose heartbeat you have known since you were conceived, who has loved you and seen you through your life, to watch her calmly pick out the songs she wants to be sung at her memorial and who she wants as honorary pallbearers.

It changes you.

I left my dog, my home, my friends and my job for weeks at a time. And time stood still.  I’m just now starting to adjust to “normal” life again.

I know I preach about being kind and taking care of one another but I can’t emphasize this enough. But this time I need to add to make sure to take care of yourself. I mean physically and I mean emotionally. Time is so precious so why waste it? Eat healthily but enjoy that cupcake! Don’t put up with people who drag you down or make you feel bad. Stop giving your all to a job that won’t remember your name if you left tomorrow.

Live your best life….. You only get one.

Regrouping

Hello friends and happy New Year!

I apologize for the extended delay…I’ve missed you all so much!

What started out as something a little minor ended up growing into several more serious things that kept me from writing.  Some days it was physical pain that kept me away. Other days it was emotional…not so much pain as just emptiness.

I always tried to keep Nordy’s Garage uplifting but at the end of 2017 I was having a tough time and I didn’t want to carry that over to you all. Then I realized that part of the reason I started this blog was to be open and honest and let others know that when they were going through something they weren’t alone.

My absence started with traveling. I went to visit my daughter before she moved further away and got very busy in her new life, then shortly thereafter I went to visit my mom who has been sick.

Then I got injured. That injury (in my back) caused me to have trouble sitting for long periods…who am I kidding…. sitting at all. I struggled through work (I have a desk job) and by the time I got home the last thing I wanted to do, or even could do was sit and write.

I was going to the doctor for treatment up to 3 times a week. My injury started to heal where I could sit for longer periods of time and I took a trip for my birthday. Then my mom got sicker…. came very close to losing her life so I traveled to see her once again.

Other things happened in between all of that and it caused me to slip into a quiet place by myself. Some people that I was incredibly close to grew distant and I found myself more alone. And I didn’t want to write. I couldn’t write. I didn’t know what to say.

Recently there was another tragedy that I faced. My longest known and best friend lost her son. I found myself so empty that I couldn’t even pray anymore. It’s not that I lost my faith but more like I had nothing left to say. I just existed. So, I asked a friend to pray for me. The morning I asked for prayers I physically felt them. God was keeping me going. No matter what, He’s always faithful.

So now it’s been a few days and I’m still struggling. I won’t lie about that. I’m struggling with several things actually. But today I was able to mutter a small prayer.

I’m still hurting, a little physically, more emotionally but I know I’ll get through even though most of the time I just want to cry and break things. But I recognize that as the grieving that I’m going through for the loss of several things.  I’m letting it happen though and embracing it so I can heal.

I guess that’s my message…. life; feel it because you can’t stop it from happening. Just don’t lose yourself or your faith in it.

As always, and maybe especially now, be kind to one another. Say I love you. Hug. Live.

Donate My Birthday

Please help me support this wonderful cause and donate my birthday. Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

https://www.facebook.com/donate/165437707385541/10214989368424689/

Digging Deeper

What are you grateful for? I know you’ve been asked that many times. I’ve asked you many times.

As I asked myself this question I realized just how fluid that question is. Our answers will change as our circumstances change.

But when we’re asked that question, most of us go to our standard list of how we’re so thankful for our friends and families. Our pets. The clothes we have. The food we eat. The home we live in.

Oh God is so good, isn’t He?

But how often are we grateful for and thank God for the not so good stuff?

When was the last time you felt thankful for the job you hate? You know, that one that allows you to have the home and food?

Or how about the person you can’t seem to get along with? The one who can make you appreciate the good people in your life a little bit more?

It’s all a matter of perspective. We need to be grateful for everything in our lives…the good and the bad.

And when things are not going well try to see how it’s doing you good. At the very least let it make you stronger. Maybe you need to have the hard time to prepare you for your next step.

You can’t grow if everything is easy. Kind of like that old saying, “No pain, no gain”.

I’m always talking about looking for the silver lining. Maybe it’s time to try seeing them in even the darkest of clouds because they are there. You just might have to look a little harder.

As always, be kind and love one another friends. Be the good in this world.

The Greatest Gift

I read something a while back that gave me pause. It said that even though Adam had perfect communion with God and he lived in a perfect, sinless place, God said it wasn’t good for Adam to be alone.

Being divorced I’ve never thought too much about being alone. It’s just what I was. Alone. It’s something I’d grown accustomed to.

I’ve been called Lil Miss Independent by some…as if I had a choice to be anything else. I was married to a military man for many years and a single mom for almost a decade after that. Not taking care of everything was never an option for me.

And I know I’m not alone in this. I have several friends who are living a similar life and it can be tiring and you often feel alone and defeated.

A common thought from my friends, since most of us are single and have been for some time… They ask why open yourself to love again? Is it worth it?

It doesn’t even have to be romantic love. Many of us keep a distance even with friends because we are afraid of losing them. We do anything to avoid the pain of loss. And most of the time it isn’t even something we think about. It’s just what has become our natural reaction to life.

But how do you know what joy is if you’ve never known sorrow? Can you truly appreciate the sunshine if you’ve never seen the rain?

Me? I choose to live by the idea of the great Maya Angelou…and I quote “Have enough courage to trust love one more time and always one more time.”

After all, what is life without love?

Beautiful You

What makes your favorite song one that you go back to listen to time and time again?

What makes the world’s most valuable art so beautiful?

It’s because they are different. Your favorite song doesn’t sound like all the other music out there. The most fascinating works of art are beautiful because they’re unique.

So why do we spend so much time and energy trying to look and act like everyone else?

Why are we so afraid to be ourselves?

Is it because we’re worried someone won’t like us? Do you realize that even if you work hard enough and end up like everyone else there’s going to be those out there that don’t like that version of you?

There is nothing wrong with the original you. As a matter of fact, you are wonderfully made.

How much more effort is it to live a façade?

Would you want someone to care about you based on a lie?

Everyone has idiosyncrasies. Why do yours have to be bad? Don’t you appreciate the things in your friends that make them different from people that are not your friends?

Why can’t we appreciate the things about us that make us special and unique?

I’ve gotten to the point in my life that if someone were to call be normal I’d be offended!

We need to learn that you may not look or act like everyone else but that’s what makes you special and unique. Embrace that, emphasize that!! Turn what YOU think is a flaw into an asset and watch how the world responds.

How can you expect others to like you when you don’t even like yourself?

I always talk about being kind to one another but it only works when you are first kind to yourself. Treat yourself like you would your best friend. After all, you’re the one you’ll live with your entire life.

Boxed Up Faith

When I get worried or stressed I have to remind myself who is in charge.

And as a Christian, I know a better way. I need to let God be in control. He shouldn’t be my co-pilot. He should be at the wheel.

Do I honestly trust the one who created me? The one who has set the beat of my very own heart?

When I pray do I whisper my longings and pains in faith? Or are my words spoken in vain?

Do we…do I, trust God to do what he’s promised? Is my faith merely lip service?

When God has shown me what I’ve asked for, why do I question it? Why do I wait for yet another “sign”? By doing that I’m are putting God in a box and telling Him to do things MY way.

Aren’t I to live by faith and not by sight?

I know why I/we question…it’s because of past damage and hurts. It’s because of all the other let downs I’ve experienced in life. It’s what I’ve come to expect. Yet in doing that I am making God equal to man and my faith is misplaced.

God will make our path clear when we ask. But the problems come when we refuse to see. When we are afraid to trust Him. Oh frail human that I am…

I guess I’m just kind of ruminating this morning. When I have a lot time on my hands, this is what I do.

Have a great week, friends! And as always, be kind to one another.

 

Back To Life

Hello July! What a month you are. Historically a very good month for me. I’ve taken trips back home to Seattle in July. It was July when I embraced a whole new mindset and lifestyle that I still practice to this day. I met some of what have become my most favorite VIPs in my life in July…just to name a few things.

I guess you could say it seems to be a time that God smiles on me. And I have no doubt this time around will be any different.

That doesn’t mean that July (or any other day or month of my life) hasn’t dealt me hardship. But over time I have learned to allow those times to make me stronger and to appreciate the good times even more.

I’m a firm believer that you can’t truly appreciate the sunshine without a little rain.

I’ve been sidelined for a while with an injury that hasn’t allowed me to be my normal self. And it’s been tough. The physical pain was bad enough but what it did to my spirit was worse. So, with today being the first day of July it was the perfect day to re-start a lot of things…my running, improving my eating habits, renewing my spirit and mindset as well.

Today on my run I spent a lot of time in prayer. It felt so good to be back out there, communing with The Creator. I felt peace again for the first time in a long time. Now the struggle will be to keep that peace!

I hope when you have a time that your life feels in chaos, or worse, empty, that you can get back to a space that reawakens you. Sometimes we have to look a little harder to find it but the work you put into finding it is worth it!

I got so tired of ALLOWING, yes ALLOWING other people and situations to steal my joy.

I feel thankful that the calendar reminded me today to seek out the joy I’ve known. So come on July…let’s do it again! Let’s make some great memories!

As always, friends…be kind, show love, be grateful and take no-one for granted. Tomorrow is never promised.

Delay Does Not Mean Denial

When we pray we expect defined and immediate answers but when we don’t get an answer we often think we aren’t heard or the answer is “no”. But more than likely the answer is simply “wait”. We’re not good at that. Especially in the fast-paced, Google everything, immediate gratification lives we live. But God knows how things work best. He knows every hair on our head, and He knows the perfect time for everything.

We just have to decide if we trust Him enough to allow Him to guide us on His timeline.

I truly believe in God’s perfect timing but that does not mean that everything happens at the same time. A perfect example is how He made our world. Sure He could have made everything all at once, in less than a split second. But He didn’t. In His infinite wisdom, He knew better. He knew that He had to prepare some things before others so that the whole plan could come to be. And I believe that is how He works in our lives as well. Some things need to be built and develop before other things can happen for various reasons. A house built without a foundation will crumble.

One that is much too familiar to me recently is an injury. I am so tired of being in pain and I want to heal yet I know that there some things that need to happen before others to support the healing process. But once the things that needed to happen first are in place then the process of healing will happen. So just because it doesn’t all happen at the same time doesn’t mean it won’t happen at all.

A delay does not mean denial. Sometimes it might simply mean God is still preparing some of the pieces. Practice patience…with yourself, with others and with God and allow Him to work things out in His unfailing timing.

 

Will The Real Snodak Please Stand Up

I decided to go for a run this morning before more rain headed our way. Yes, I’m in pain but I am used to sucking it up and figured the doc can just put me back together later this morning…LOL! I know I’ve said it before, but I’m not a runner. I just run. I don’t necessarily enjoy it. It’s more like I’m compelled to do it. I don’t time myself and I don’t often check distance. I just run until I’m done. Maybe I’m a distant cousin to Forrest Gump? I decided against music today, instead taking time to pray. I laid my heart bare for The Father (not like He didn’t already know) but I needed to hand it over. I did about two miles when I decided to stop and head to my car. As I got to the parking lot and finished talking to The Peace giver I realized I was crying. I don’t know why, I just know I was. And as I finished my plea, the wind picked up and dried my tears and I came home to submit this…

 

Every day I learn something new. Some days it’s something I’ve sought out to learn, other days life simply hands me a lesson…or sometimes smacks me upside the head with one. I’ve noticed (and those that know me have noticed and mentioned) I’ve been a bit off lately (trust me when I tell you that they used much more colorful terminology than “off”). I couldn’t really put my finger on what has been wrong but I think it’s starting to come to light for me.

I have been dubbed “one of the happy people”, “a unicorn”, “somehow untouched by life”, and “naturally happy”.  That cannot be further from the truth, and sometimes I find it rather insulting.  I have been through hell and back and have the physical and emotional scars to prove it. I have worked long and hard to try and stay positive and make the best of the life I have and somehow it boils down to  I’m just a naturally happy person for some people. Like it comes so easy. With years of training myself, it has gotten easier but it’s not simply easy. Yes, it has been a long time since I’ve allowed the world to completely crushed me and I don’t want to start now. So today’s learning experience is finding out how to deal with anger…again. One of the “steps”.

Because I realized that I am grieving several things in my life.

When I finally took notice of my (re)actions to things I put two and two together and it became pretty clear what has been going on with me. It’s hard to admit, and I’m not sure why. Grieving isn’t a weakness. It’s a human experience. Yet it’s something most of us won’t admit to or have a hard time admitting when we are down, or hurting, or feeling some other emotion considered less than perfect lest it makes us appear weak. What are we doing to ourselves? We have stopped reaching out to one another in joy and in sorrow and instead isolate and self-medicate.  And we wonder why life is so hard. I know we don’t seem to value each other enough. We treat people like they are dispensable and easily replaceable. Maybe it’s because we don’t value ourselves enough.

I know that there are just some emotions that we have to deal with and need to learn to deal with properly.  And I need to get back to finding me and working on how I want to be even though all of you think it comes so naturally to me.

I know this isn’t the normal update you get from me but I am a real person with real life issues and through this medium I am hoping to find that some of you can relate and know you are not alone. Yes, I want to encourage and uplift but part of that is showing you that you can overcome.

As always, be kind to one another. We’ll get through it together.

Until next time….think about what’s good today, friends!

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