Hello friends! I mentioned an update in my last post so I need to get to it!
I’m sorry to have neglected you for so long but a lot has happened and I have needed time to absorb and deal with it all.
I am often talking about living your life and following your path and I finally did just that!
I knew it was time to make a change and I prayed a lot about it and as doors were closing where I was, I trusted God and followed the doors He opened.
Since being here things have gone fairly smoothly. And when they haven’t, I haven’t gotten worked up about it. I’ve dealt with it and learned.
As I said in a previous FB video, unfortunately, along the way I lost two people that meant more to me than I can express. I’m angry, sad, hurt and about a thousand other emotions I can’t put into words. One I lost to…I don’t even know how to say it other than extenuating circumstances. The other to what they are saying is suicide. I can’t believe either one happened. I always thought they would be part of my life always. People who I would continue to share my life with forever. But I guess they had other plans. When someone leaves your life, especially suddenly and unexpectedly as both of these did, it leaves an emptiness that you can’t explain and most likely will never fill. So here I am, just after midnight into July 4th. What an appropriate day to do my best to break free and find independence from it all.
I will probably never know the whole story with either person. But one thing has been solidified to me…always, always tell people how you feel. I know we all hear it all the time, and I know I say it all the time, but we hear it all the time because it’s true!
I go to the FB page of my friend who died just to see his face and relive memories. I re-read our texts, and messages and look at pictures and linger on the last things we said to one another. I always told him how I felt so I don’t have that regret but a month later I see people still writing on his page saying “I don’t think I ever told you”. I don’t ever want to be one of those people.
There are times that it has drained me. I’ve emptied myself more than once without being refilled. It’s left me exhausted physically and emotionally but I have an innate drive to make the world better. To uplift people. It doesn’t make me better or worse than anyone. It’s just my purpose in life. It always has been and I’ve always known it. It just manifests itself in different ways.
So as I start this new chapter in my life I’m excited to share it all with you. I’m trying to come to grips with everything that has happened and embrace what is to come. I hope you all stick around and come along for the ride because I’m on a new road!
I’m too tired for the details as to how I got to where I am but I promise to fill in the blanks soon.
Just remember this, friends….You only get one shot at life so make it count. Make it last. Make it worth every heartbreak, every smile, every tear, every memory.
This is your life, your destiny, your fate…this is your only chance.